I haven't posted anything for so long. I've been busy. Wait, that's not true. I mean it's true that I've been busy - who isn't? - but that is not the real reason for my not appearing on the page. Truth be told, I was scared.
Just like me to start out like a canon ball and fizzle out after a few tries. There is no lack for things to say. In fact, there's more to say today than there ever was. More stories to tell, the kind that are deep, introspective, moving, worthwhile. But they are all locked up inside this heart that is contracting instead of expanding.
Fear. Same old cold & dark & dank thing. I am letting this neurosis take hold of me again.
I'm going to put a stop to it, right here, right now. I say enough.
Enough of having to put the pressure to be perfect because I am not. Never was. Never will be.
Enough of having to make excuses because there are none.
Enough of having to worry about who says what about this or that because they don't matter.
Enough of being selfish, self-centered and self-loathing.
Enough of being too hard on myself because ~
I AM ENOUGH.
I am enough...
... the way I am in all my glorious imperfection.
...the way I am with all my talents and my lack thereof.
...the way I am with the direction I choose to go at the speed I'm comfortable with.
...with all my many layers that meld into one and makes for the colorful, wild woman that I am.
...the way I am happypeaceful one minute, stressed out of my mind the next, confused, bewildered, inlove, inlust, content, discontent, organized, dirty, smart, ignorant, compassionate, egocentric, loving, controlling, meditative, loud, soft, sharp ~
...the way I am growing...Growing...GROWING...
I am enough. Always have been. Always will be.
And. So. Are. You.
Wunjo, The Rune of Joy/Light